There is a topic that has bothered me for quite some time. One that I guess no matter how often I have heard it in my life, I just don't understand how it's possible. For instance, when you are feeling an extreme sorrow, anger, or any type of strong negative emotion, you hear people say, "you can choose to not feel like that, you can choose to be happy and not dwell."
I just don't get it. I mean really get it. Yes, you can mask your pain and put on a "front" for others to see but on the inside you still FEEL that emotion. You can choose to not react in a physical way but does it really change how you feel inside? I know time does wonders for how things can change with how you feel but in that moment? Nope, I can't just make it disappear.
I have had several crappy weekends. Things occurring that just make you feel like you have been punched in the stomach and you just can't shake the inward insanity going on. Through it though, I get told that I can choose to ignore it, and can choose not to let it bother me. I call BS on that. I mean really. I know I can choose to not let it effect my life, such as, I will still get up each morning, I will still play with my kids, but, to say I can just shut off how it made me feel inside? No, that isn't controllable to me. That sick feeling in my stomach, the anxiety? Yep, it's still there.
Which leads me to another subject. Why do people choose to use their words in such a way that hurts someone else? I am guilty of this myself so don't think I'm saying I haven't done it. I have, all too often. Why as grown adults do we choose to slap at our friends, loved ones, with our words? I am always telling my kids to please be nicer with your words when someone upsets them. Why do we want that from our children when adults everyday lead by example of how to hurt someone the most by their ugly words or hateful tone.
These thoughts are random but have been swirling in my head for a few weeks. Its been a tough few weeks and as I sit here, I feel the hurt of someone's words that were so ugly. Words that they probably don't even realize how much hurt they have caused. And then I consider, how many times have I been the one to do the hurting? Way too often, for sure.