Let's Play Catch Up

I have so much to say and so little time to say it! Things are busy around here which is really our normal. I am okay with it for the most part. I come home from either work or school everyday and have about 30 minutes of laying flat on my face in bed for 30 minutes before I pick up those creatures we lovingly call children. Children are scary sometimes. And exhausted. But so darn cute at the same time.

I have a little bit of time in between classes today so I decided to take the time and play catch up. I should be working on assignments. I miss my blog though. And comments. And reading about your life.


See this picture?

That's my boy making 67 yard touchdown. He's basically a power house on the football field. It's been a stunning revelation to us all. He's really truly amazing. That's not just Momma talking. The entire coaching staff tells me it every single practice. It's pretty cool but I would love him even if he was awful and still think he was amazing, because really he is one amazing kid.

That oldest child of mine? She's pretty amazing herself. She started playing the clarinet this year in band. She LOVES it. It makes her incredibly happy. They did their chair test last week which I knew nothing about and she comes home telling me she made 1st chair out of 8! That pretty much means she's awesome. Sooo proud of her and better yet she is soo proud of herself!

My children? They ROCK.

The wee little punk of mine is doing fantastic herself. She is loving school and really coming out of her shell. She is less shy and finally makes instant friends with other children she has never met. Two months ago, she wouldn't do that at all. It's really exciting to see her finally open up to others. She misses me though and I have to say I secretly love that. She enjoys going to school but she asked me the other day if I miss her when she is gone and I said, "yes very much, I miss our cartoon mornings and hold your hand." She said, "Me too Momma, I miss laying in your bed while you laugh at Micktey Mouse with me." Baby girl, you have no idea how much Momma misses you. The rare times I am at home by myself, I miss my partner in crime so much.

It's an odd feeling having all three children in school now. They are just all so big and growing up so fast. I know people say that all the time but wow, it really is fast. I mean I have an 11 year old that I have to go buy her first real bra for soon. The 8 year old who is my constant stubborn mule is entirely too smart for his own good and knows how to work his Momma a little to well. Then my baby, who should still be running around in diapers is now a big school girl. When the hell did that happen?

I need new pictures. I was going through and looking for some of all of us to post here. Umm yeah...I have nothing new. I have a bunch of football pictures that need to be sorted but nothing of all of us. Must fix that soon. Until then my lovelies, I am off to my next class. Enjoy the rest of your week and know I miss the blogging community.

............

I AM EXHAUSTED.

that is all.

Do your dreams scare you??

If you have been a reader of mine long or someone who came from my old blog, you will know that I have these insanely vivid dreams. I mean the kind where I wake up some mornings trying to figure out if that was a dream or not. Or the type of dreams that when they come back to me days later, I really have to think hard if that really happened or if it was just a dream. Ya know like, "did I really have that conversation with my husband or just dream about it?" I'm not joking. I have had to ask my husband before about a conversation and he was so confused until I realized it had to been in my dreams.

Anyways, these dreams. They are getting horrible. Over the last few months I keep have these same dreams that my youngest daughter has cancer. These dreams vary by a little but it's always the same hospital, the same cancer, the same horrible, horrible dream. I can't stop thinking about it. It is driving me crazy. And I worry. I know sounds crazy right???

I think it is because I have read a blog of a little girl with cancer? Is it because my best friends baby boy died from cancer? Do I just worry about this deep down and it comes out in dreams? I don't know. Seriously though...it's making me feel sick when I wake up. And it's happening all the time. All the time. I would say atleast 2x a week. That's a LOT!

What made it all the worse was when that cyst ruputred on her finger, they mentioned cancer. And it scared the shit out of me. No lie. I panicked. After her surgery when they got a good look at it, they weren't as worried anymore and said that they don't see that as a concern now. That made me able to breathe easier and those results will be back by the time we go back for her follow up on Friday.

Does anybody else out there have crazy dreams like this that pester you day in and day out? Am I CRAZY?? Because really, this is getting old and it makes me worry that maybe it's not so crazy. Maybe there is something to my dreams. Or not. D

Do you think I am crazy? I mean outside the normal of my crazy?

Surgery went really well. It looks to be that her cyst was ruptured when she possibly hit it on something without even realizing it. The small vessels in her finger ruptured which caused all the swelling and pain. They open it up and it was full of old blood so they are pretty positive that the pathology report will come back 100% good. It's a huge relief for us.

She did amazing before hand, she was calm and very happy. Her daddy spoiled her rotten. He went and got her some slippers for her Princess dress that she decided to wear to the hospital. If one has to have surgery, one should do it in style! Then he got her a little charm bracelet to go with it all. That was all for BEFORE surgery. Then there was the AFTER surgery goodies....

Along with giant baby who she named after her nusre Mary Melissa, she got a pack of lip glosses and fingernail polishes. Let's just say daddy went overboard! The recovery period of surgery was pretty brutal. She was hysterical, scared, and in a lot of pain. We got through it though and so glad that she is feeling so much better today!

Surgery

Ms. Squeakers is having surgery tomorrow. I am a jumbled mess of nerves. It was not a set surgery, not expected. Went to the Dr. this morning at 7:45am and come back at 5:00 this evening with knowing we have surgery in the morning. It's not a comfortable feeling. At all.

We spent the morning with the pediatrician who then referred us to the surgeon, who then says, yes she needs surgery. Like immediately. Hmm...like now? They said no, we can wait a bit. Like till tomorrow. So, then the rest of the day was spent registering for surgery, setting up payments, and all that fun jazz that makes things complicated when you don't have health insurance.

All in all, I know she will be fine. It's a quick surgery. She has a cyst on her finger. It's been there since she was 2 and now suddenly it's a problem. It's massive in the last two weeks. It's taking over her entire finger and making it hard for her to move it which isn't good seeing as it's on her writing hand. Did I mention that they mentioned cancer? Yeah. Nope...nerves. Not handling them too well in this moment.

So, yes this is a off the wall post. Weird in fact, I am asking for prayer. Prayer for my daughter's surgery to go smoothly. Prayer for the pathology reports to come back normal. Prayer for my nerves. She will be fine. We will be fine. Praying through our nerves.

A God moment happen today that I do want to share and will try to post for tomorrow before I go to sleep tonight. I have to get some homework done and then will post.

God is good all the time, all the time God is good.